Hey guys,
I've been censoring this blog quite a bit, only talking about the great things that are going on. But I have to be honest that I've been feeling really homesick throughout this whole trip. Some of you already know this, having received long e-mails from me about it. I thought that, given enough time, everything would settle down a bit. But it really hasn't. Every morning, I wake up and have a private battle with myself to keep going, when all I really want to do is come home. Maybe I took on too big a challenge too soon after school, not giving myself any time to decompress. My poor family had to endure a sobbing phone call on Thursday night, Calgary time. I've planned this trip for so long, and paid a fair bit of money for it. But I don't want to waste my time in these beautiful places feeling sad. I've felt so lost, lately! I keep asking myself what I'm doing here, and I can't seem to remember the answer. I hate to worry you guys, or sound like a whiney, spoiled child, but I could really use some advice. I'm seriously considering coming home early. This morning, I told myself that I should plan to go home after Thailand. After that, I felt much, much better. But I don't want to give up too early.
I don't want to live with any regrets. I don't want to regret giving up on this trip. I also don't want to regret continuing with this trip and not enjoying it. The thought of staying longer makes me panic a bit. Although the thought of leaving early makes me sad and a little disappointed in myself for not being stronger.
I'm not sure what to do. Any advice?
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3 comments:
Hey Kat,
I know EXACTLY what you mean. I felt the exact same way when I went to see Matt in Aus and my purse got stolen and Matt dumped me three days after getting there.
What I did is what you are trying to do..I tried to tough it out..but really what I needed the most was the support from my family and friends, and so I cut my trip short. Do I regret it? No, mostly because the places I didn't get to go to, I went to a couple years later to make up for it :)
As much as it seems like you're going to be letting people down if you come home early, it is better to go home early then to try to stick it out and have a horrible time because of it. Just remember that. Whicever decision will make you the happiest is the one you should take, hands down :)
My darling,
Aww, I just wanna give you a great big HUGE hug right now. I am! Can you feel it? I am squeezing you SOOO tight! My best friend Karoline is currently living and working in South Africa and has been since September. She experienced those same feelings that you are at first and still does now from time to time. She says that she would not have regretted deciding to come home but also does not regret not coming home. While she still struggles, she knows that the end is in sight and that the whole experience was a true adventure. (personally, I want her to come home! I miss her!) However, whatever you decide to do, it is not going to be something to regret because those places will always be there, the money will always exist to travel, and the dreams and desires to travel will always live long. Do not regret whatever choice you make! I wish you all the best! I know you will make the right choice FOR YOU! (I know that is not a solid answer, but take from it what you will!). Also, I have some very fun Ukrainian friends who live in Australia who I can hook you up with for a good time if you do decide to go on! Take care... :-D
Miss Stephanie
Hi Katherine! I think you'll find your travel groove eventually. Your friends and family will be here to support you where ever in the world you happen to be. Hang in there, this is an adventure of a lifetime!
While I agree with the others, I do want to point out that you will not have the same experience if you come back in a few years to visit the places you missed. Yes, the places may still be there, but you will be a different person in a few years.
Definitely consider this decision carefully. Hang in for at least 1 more week until Oz and things might get better! If you're still miserable, then it's time to consider coming home. No point in wasting time and money in being miserable.
Be strong, you can do this! *hugs*
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